A long, long time ago, at a time when men wears skirt and were proud of it, at a time when witches were burn at the stakes and chips simply means potato strips and not silicon. A while after Galileo was put under house arrest for saying that earth is not flat, at some sides of the world, the pirates reigned.

And according to the pirates, or rather, the latest installment of the Pirates of the Caribbean, the End of The World is actually Singapore.

And that’s about the only thing I remembered from the movie, having seen it in the previous 24hours.

The cabinet should endorse a law that approves life long imprisonment without parol or any possibility to appeal, for any idiots who talks in a movie. And if they talk about really, really irritating things, The law should also decapitate their stupid heads.

Queen Elizabeth was said to have only one bath per week wether she needs it or not, which is why she’s probably always irritated and behead people on a daily basis. If only she lives in this era, I’d like to bring her to the movies… after making sure she hadn’t had her bath in a month. All the flying heads will probably relieves me from depression…. Cool.

That said… thanks to stupid talking heads.. I need to re-watch the pirates. Anyone?

Having not read a single news, be it on shelf linings or online, since the Virginia Tech massacre, you would have thought a lot of things have changed in the world. But aside from more unnecessary fatalities in the Middle East and Samy Vellu’s unending smugness that no one can prove him guilty of bribe ~ well, there’s just more doom in the newspaper than all Korean series put together. And that’s saying something considering the buckets of tears I sacrified over broken hearted yummy ooppa-s. .

I am depressed.
If I lived in a bamboo house right now, I’d have blown off the roof with my sighs

What NOT TO do when feeling depressed

5. Read newspapers – Just not the ones from Earth.
You can read news from Mars or Pluto or The Planet Nameck Daily; for all we know there are probably a hunnred times more cheery bunch of Uruk Hai-s and Smeagols out there as compared to us lowly buncha losers.

4. Eat betrayal chocolates – just don’t.

3. Work – A big no no.
If your boss asked, just tell him if someone forced you to lift your hand to your keyboard right now, they’ll be responsible for future side effects to fellow officemates such as mutilated and garroted body parts displayed on the wall. If they read about Virginia Tech, they’d probably leave you alone for as long as you display the word ‘depressed’ on your forehead. As such I justified my whole day at work today watching Gray’s Anatomy reruns (again) and Korean game shows.

2. Walk –
Walking makes you more depressed with every step you take. It’s like when the Japanese jog, they’d mutter one, two, one, two… but when depressed me walk, it felt more like one, pig, one, pig, one, pig,pig, PIG!…. At times like this?Don’t walk. Just roll about. People will understand. And it’s not like I really like pig in particulars, it’s just becuz I like pink. And somehow pigs are highly associated with depression.

1. Think – Hazardous.
Why else do you think Spongebob is so happy every damned week? Cuz sponges don’t have brains. And Bush, and Luffy, Britney, Lorelai Gilmore..

And Cheeps & Inachan just did not deliver today. Just when you really expect them to, (abes nak expect aper lagi kalau dah datang meja orang screaming ‘ADE GOSSIP!’ kan??) they failed spectacularly at trying to churn out a decent gossip today when they did it so excellently every other day. So I’m blaming them for making me more depressed, and heck, while I’m at it I might as well blame them for this whole depression bout.

Against all odds, (odds inclusive of four direction blind peoples, crazily high IQ old geezers and weird malay riddles)... we managed to find the treasures.

And the picture sez it all!! (^_^) yayyy for the dizzy grasshoppers!